it struck me for the first time that on his visiting card he only has
Dr. jur. A. Pruckmuller, and then I remembered that last summer, when we
first made his acquaintance, Dora said, It's a pity he's called August,
the name does not suit him at all. Well, we laughed till we felt quite
ill, for of course Hella began to sing: "O du lieber Augustin," and
then I thought of Der dumme August [clown's nickname in circus] and we
wondered what Dora would call him. Gusti or Gustel, or Augi, my darling
Augi, my beloved Gusterl, oh dear, we were in fits of laughter. Then
we discussed what names we should like to have for our husbands, and I
said: Ewald or Leo, and Hella said: Wouldn't you like Siegfried? But I
put my hand on her mouth and said: "Shut up, or you will make me really
angry, _that_ is and must remain forgotten." She said what she would
like best would be to have a husband called Peter or Thamian or
Chrysostomus; then for a pet name she would use Dami or Sosti; and then
she said quite seriously that she would only marry a man called Egon, or
Alexander, or at least Georg. Just at that moment her mother came in to
call us to tea, and she said: "What's an that about Alexander and Georg?
You are such dreadful girls. If you are alone together for a couple
of minutes (I had come at half past 2 and the Brs. have tea at 4,
and that's what Hella's mother calls 2 minutes), you begin to talk of
unsuitable things." Hella was afraid her mother would think God knows
what, so she said: "Oh no, Mother, we were only discussing what names we
should like our fiances to have." You ought to have seen how her mother
went on. "That's just it, that when you are barely 15 (I'm not 15 yet)
you should have nothing but _such_ things in your heads!" _Such_ things,
how absurd. At tea it was almost as dull as it was the other evening
at home; for the Herr Baron was there, that is, they all say Du to one
another now, for the wedding is to be in February, as soon as it is
settled whether the Baron is to stay in London or to be transferred to
Berlin. It must be funny to say "Du" to a strange man. Hella says she
soon got used to it, and that she likes Paul well enough. When he brings
Lizzi sweets, when he is taking her to the theatre, he always gives
Hella a box for herself. _Other_ people would certainly not do that, and
I know _other_ people who wouldn't accept it. When I got home, Father
said: Well, another time I think you'd better stay and sleep at the
Brs., and I said: I did not want to be a killjoy here. And Oswald said:
"What you need is a box on the ear," Father was luckily out of the room
already and so I said: "_Your_ children, if you ever have any, can be
kept in order by boxing their ears till they are green and blue, but you
have no rights over your sisters, Father told you so in Fieberbrunn."
"Oh, I know Father always backs you two up, he has done so from the
first." "Please don't draw me into your quarrels," said Dora, as if she
had been something quite different from me. And then Aunt Dora said: "I
do wish you would not keep on quarreling." "_I_ didn't begin it," said
I, and went away without saying goodnight; that is I went to Father's
room to say goodnight to him and I saw Aunt Dora in the hall, but I
_didn't_ say goodnight to Oswald and Dora, for I'm not going to put up
with _everything_. And now it's half past 11 already, for I have been
writing such a long time, and have cried such a lot, for I'm _very_
unhappy. Even Hella doesn't know how unhappy I am. I must go to bed
now; whether I shall sleep or not is another question. If I can possibly
manage it, I shall go alone to the cemetery to-morrow.

31st. Hella and I went to the cemetery to-day. Her father and mother
returned to Cracow yesterday evening, and she told her grandmother she
was going to spend the morning with me, and I said I was going to the
Brs., so we went alone to Potzleinsdorf. Hella went for a walk round the
cemetery while I went to darling Mother's grave. I am so unhappy; Hella
consoles me as much as she can, but even she can't understand.

January 1, 19--! Of course we did not keep New Year's Eve yesterday, but
were quite alone and it was very melancholy. This morning Dr. P. brought
Dora and Aunt Dora some roses and he gave me some lovely violets as a
New Year's greeting. He is leaving on the 4th, so he is coming here
on the evening of the 3rd. I can't say I look forward to it. To-morrow
school begins thank goodness. I met a dust cart, that means good luck;
Father says it is a scandal the way the dirt carts go on all through the
day in Vienna, and that one should see one even on New Year's day at 2
in the afternoon. But still, if it means _good luck!_

January 2nd. The dust cart did bring good luck. We had a real piece of
_luck_ to-day! In the big interval I noticed a little knot of girls in
the hall, and suddenly I felt as if my heart would stop beating. Frau
Doktor M., I should say Frau Professor Theyer, was standing among them,
she saw us directly and held out her hand to us so we kissed it. She has
come to visit her parents and _her husband_ is with her; since she did
not know for certain whether she would be able to come to the school she
had not written either to me or to Hella about it. She is so lovely and
so entrancingly loveable. When the bell rang for class and Frau Doktor
Dunker came in I saw that _she_ was still standing outside. So I put my
handkerchief up to my face as if my nose were bleeding, and rushed out
to her. And because I slipped and nearly fell, she held out her arms to
me. Hardly had I reached her, when Hella came out and said: "Of course I
understood directly; I said you were awfully bad, so I must go and look
after you." Then the Frau Professor laughed like anything and said: "You
are such wicked little actresses; I must send you back immediately." But
of course she did not but was frightfully sweet. Then we begged her
to let us stay with her, but she said: "No, no, I've been your teacher
here, and I must not encourage you in mischief. But here is a better
idea. Would you like to come and see me to-morrow?" "Rather," we both
exclaimed. She said she was staying in a hotel, but we must not come
alone to a hotel, so she would see us at her parents, in Schwindgasse,
and we were to come there at 4 or half past. Then we kissed both her
hands and were so happy! To-morrow at 4! Oh dear, a whole night more and
nearly a whole day to wait. "If your parents allow you," she said; as
if Father or even Hella's grandmother would not allow _that!_ All Father
said was: "All right Gretel, but don't go quite off your head first or
you won't be able to find your way to Schwindgasse. Is Hella as crazy as
you are?" Of course, how can one be otherwise?