tears as if they would never stop.
   Lenny came to see him at three o'clock. Grave, pale, wearing a gray cotton windbreaker 
that John had never seen before. He came into the room and stood with his hands in his 
pockets, looking at his father and biting his lip.
   'Lenny?' said John hoarsely.
   'Hullo, Dad,' said Lenny.
   'Sit down; you can pull up that chair over there. How are things?' Did Mr. Felling 
bring you down here?'
   Lenny remained standing. 'Mr. Felling told me you won't be able to walk.'
   John attempted a smile. 'Well, maybe I won't and maybe I will. We're going to have to 
see about that. I talked to my doctor today and he seems to think there's a chance. Not 
much of a chance, but a chance.'
   'Daddy,' said Lenny, 'I'm real sorry about what happened.'
   'Well, me too,' John breathed.
   Lenny came closer, and took hold of his father's hand. It was a strikingly adult 
gesture. 'You don't understand, I mean I'm sorry.'
   'Listen, it wasn't your fault.'
   'It was, Daddy. It was all my fault. I should have listened to that detective.'
   John tried to lift his head, but couldn't. 'You mean that detective who was supposed 
to have said something to you but didn't?' 
   'You still don't believe me, do you?' Lenny protested.
   John said, 'Forgive me. Will you forgive me? I'm more than a little crazy at the 
moment. Apart from that, they've given me every painkilling drug known to medical 
science. They could cut both my legs off and I wouldn't even notice.'
   'He said I was one of them,' said Lenny.
   John closed his eyes for a moment to calm himself down, then opened them again. 'Have 
you any idea what that means, "one of them"? When I was a kid, that used to mean that you 
were a faggot.'
   'Detective Clay didn't mean that,' Lenny replied. 'It means -1 don't know. I 
understand what it means, but I can't explain it.'
   John looked at his son and smiled. 'You don't have to explain anything, and you don't 
have to apologize for anything.'
   'But I do, Daddy. I have to explain. Otherwise it could happen again.'
   'What do you mean, it could happen again?'
   'Well, the first time it tore up your room, and the second time it killed Jennifer and 
made you a cripple, but what if it wants more? What if it's going to go on chasing you, 
until you're dead?'
   John's voice was unsteady with emotion. 'Lenny, I love you, but this is nonsense. 
Whatever happened at Chestnut Hill was nothing to do with you and it was nothing to do 
with me. Somebody broke into the house and attacked us. That's all. It was just one of 
those acts of totally mindless violence. Sometimes people do things like that, for no 
reason that anybody can think of. You remember the guy who splashed gasoline on the 
people in a supermarket line and set them alight? Or the other guy who shot all those 
people at McDonald's? Mindless, totally crazy. They have some kind of personality 
disorder, and one day it just takes over and they start to believe that they're Rambo or 
Freddie Krueger or something. That's all.'
   Lenny said nothing, watching his father with eyes that were unusually opaque. Then he 
turned and dragged the chair over, and sat very close to the bed.
   'Daddy,' he said softly. 'I saw Mommy again.'
   'Lenny,' John told him, 'I'm not sure I want to hear that stuff about Mommy anymore.'
   'It isn't stuff, it's true. I saw her yesterday, at Mr. Felling's house, just before I 
went to bed. She was standing on the lawn and she was waving to me.'
   John closed his eyes for a moment. Then he said, 'Lenny, will you please get it 
through your head that Mommy is dead. Jennifer is dead, too, and your daddy can't even 
look after himself right now, let alone you. You're going to have to come to grips with 
reality, Lenny, with real life.'
   'Daddy,' Lenny insisted. 'I saw her. I keep thinking that she wants to tell me 
something.'
   'If s a hallucination, Lenny. It's your mind playing tricks on you.'
   Lenny was about to insist yet again that it wasn't; but then John winced and grunted, 
and even though he was only nine years old, Lenny realized that he was causing his daddy 
a lot of pain, both physical and mental. He lowered his head and said, 'Okay, Daddy. I 
guess you're right.'
   John said, 'How are you getting along with Mr. Felling?'
   'Okay. He's great. He lets me stay up to watch Twilight Zone.'
   'You're not too homesick?'
   Lenny hesitated for a moment, and then he said, his head still lowered, 'I cry 
sometimes.'
   'Well, me too,' admitted John. There was silence between them for a long moment. Then 
John said gently, 'Lenny ... that night at Mr. Felling's house when Jennifer was killed - 
did you hear anything, or see anything?'
   Lenny shook his head. 'I was asleep. I didn't wake up till I heard Jennifer screaming.'
   'Then what did you do?'
   'I ran into your bedroom, and you were lying on the floor and Jennifer was all bloody.'
   'But you didn't see the man who did it? You didn't even get a glimpse?'
   'No, sir.'
   John lifted his head up a little, then let it fall back onto the pillow. 'Did the 
police talk to you?'
   Lenny nodded.
   'Who was it, Sergeant Clay?'
   Lenny nodded again. 'Him and two others.'
   'Yes, I guessed it would be,' said John. 'Sergeant Clay is supposed to come see me 
this afternoon.'
   Lenny looked up, and his eyes were bright and serious. 'You won't be angry with him, 
will you, Daddy? Not like you were before. He understands what's happening.'
   'Oh, really? And what is happening?'
   But before Lenny could answer, the door opened and Sister Perpetua ushered Jack 
Felling into the room. Jack was a big, heavily built man, a one-time quarterback for 
Philly U, with wavy iron-gray hair and a generous, German-ugly face. He approached John's 
bedside, laid his hand on Lenny's shoulder, and said, 'John ... I don't know what to say 
to you. I just don't have the words.'
   John said, 'You're looking after Lenny for me. That's a whole lot more helpful than 
words.'
   'But Jenny...' said Jack. 'She was such a goddamned beautiful girl.' 
   'I know,' said John, and those hot tears started again. Lenny tugged out a Kleenex and 
dabbed at his father's eyes.
   The police have no idea what happened,' Jack explained. "There was no sign of a forced 
entry into the house - the alarm system was still switched on, and nobody had triggered 
it. The way I understand it, those thick-headed flatfoots at Chestnut Hill were trying to 
pin it on you to begin with, until the hospital gave them all the details of your