Any one may judge what a condition I must be in all this, who was
but a young sailor, and who had been in such a fright before at but
a little. But if I can express at this distance the thoughts I had
about me at that time, I was in tenfold more horror of mind upon
account of my former convictions, and then having returned from them
to the resolutions I had wickedly taken at first, than I was at
death itself; and these, added to the terror of the storm, put me into
such a condition that I can by no words describe it. But the worst was
not come yet; the storm continued with such fury that the seamen
themselves acknowledged they had never known a worse. We had a good
ship, but she was deep loaden, and wallowed in the sea, that the
seamen every now and then cried out she would founder. It was my
advantage in one respect, that I did not know what they meant by
founder till I inquired. However, the storm was so violent 'that I saw
what is not often seen, the master, the boatswain, and some others
more sensible than the rest, at their prayers, and expecting every
moment when the ship would go to the bottom. In the middle of the
night, and under all the rest of our distresses, one of the men that
had been down on purpose to see, cried out we had sprung a leak;
another said there was four foot water in the hold. Then all hands
were called to the pump. At that very word my heart, as I thought,
died within me, and I fell backwards upon the side of my bed where I
sat, into the cabin. However, the men aroused me, and told me that
I, that was able to do nothing before, was as well able to pump as
another; at which I stirred up and went to the pump and worked very
heartily. While this was doing, the master seeing some light colliers,
who, not able to ride out the storm, were obliged to slip and run away
to sea, and would come near us, ordered to fire a gun as a signal of
distress. I, who knew nothing what that meant, was so surprised that I
thought the ship had broke, or some dreadful thing had happened. In
a word, I was so surprised that I fell down in a swoon. As this was
a time when everybody had his own life to think of, nobody minded
me, or what was become of me; but another man stepped up to the
pump, and thrusting me aside with his foot, let me lie, thinking I had
been dead; and it was a great while before I came to myself.

  We worked on, but the water increasing in the hold, it was
apparent that the ship would founder, and though the storm began to
abate a little, yet as it was not possible she could swim till we
might run into a port, so the master continued firing guns for help;
and a light ship, who had rid it out just ahead of us, ventured a boat
out to help us. It was with the utmost hazard the boat came near us,
but it was impossible for us to get on board, or for the boat to lie
near the ship's side, till at last the men rowing very heartily, and
venturing their lives to save ours, our men cast them a rope over
the stern with a buoy to it, and then veered it out a great length,
which they after great labor and hazard took hold of, and we hauled
them close under our stern, and got all into their boat. It was to
no purpose for them or us after we were in the boat to think of
reaching to their own ship, so all agreed to let her drive, and only
to pull her in towards shore as much as we could, and our master
promised them that if the boat was staved upon shore he would make
it good to their master; so partly rowing and partly driving, our boat
went away to the norward, sloping towards the shore almost as far as
Winterton Ness.

  We were not much more than a quarter of an hour out of our ship
but we saw her sink, and then I understood for the first time what was
meant by a ship foundering in the sea. I must acknowledge I had hardly
eyes to look up when the seamen told me she was sinking; for from that
moment they rather put me into the boat than that I might be said to
go in; my heart was, as it were, dead within me, partly with fright,
partly with horror of mind and the thoughts of what was yet before me.

  While we were in this condition, the men yet laboring at the oar
to bring the boat near the shore, we could see, when, our boat,
mounting the waves, we were able to see the shore" great many people
running along the shore to assist us when we should come near. But
we made but slow way towards the shore, nor were we able to reach
the shore, till being past the lighthouse at Winterton, the shore
falls off to the westward towards Cromer, and so the land broke off
a little the violence of the wind. Here we got in, and though not
without much difficulty got all safe on shore, and walked afterwards
on foot to Yarmouth, where, as unfortunate men, we were used with
great humanity as well by the magistrates of the town, who assigned us
good quarters, as by particular merchants and owners of ships, and had
money given us sufficient to carry us either to London or back to
Hull, as we thought fit.

  Had I now had the sense to have gone back to Hull, and have gone
home, I had been happy, and my father, an emblem of our blessed
Saviour's parable, had even killed the fatted calf for me; for hearing
the ship I went away in was cast away in Yarmouth road, it was a great
while before he had any assurance that I was not drowned.

  But my ill fate pushed me on now with an obstinacy that nothing
could resist; and though I had several times loud calls from my reason
and my more composed judgment to get home, yet I had no power to do
it. I knew not what to call this, nor will I urge that it is a
secret overruling decree that hurries us on to be the instruments of
our own destruction, even though it be before us, and that we rush
upon it with our eyes open. Certainly nothing but some such decreed
unavoidable misery attending, and which it was impossible for me to
escape, could have pushed me forward against the calm reasonings and
persuasions of my most retired thoughts, and against two such
visible instructions as I had met with in my first attempt.

  My comrade, who had helped to harden me before, and who was the
master's son, was now less forward than I. The first time he spoke
to me after we were at Yarmouth, which was not till two or three days,